Storytime with Rep. Kevin McCarthy: George Washington and the Cherry Tree

This week, Rep. Kevin McCarthy, the Republican Representative of California’s 23rd District, shares a story with our readers.

Boys and girls, I’m here to share a story with you about George Washington, our very first and second best president after President Trump. Lincoln is number three and number four is Reagan, but I’m not going to get into that right now.

Before George was president, he was a kid just like you! He used to run and play and jump and skip and catch smallpox because he was unvaccinated just like you! George went to school, ate his vegetables, went to church, and owned human beings as property just like you!

Well, on his sixth birthday, George’s dad got him an axe. His dad probably wanted to get him a gun, but couldn’t because we were still under imperial rule of the British King, George III, and hadn’t developed the Second Amendment. The Second Amendment, by the way, guarantees our rights to own guns and is the most important amendment despite being the second one.

I digress.

So, George got an axe. And if you got an axe as a present when you were only six years old, what would you do?

That’s right! You’d go use it! You’d chop some wood!

Well, that’s exactly what little George Washington did. He was so excited that he went out and chopped down the first tree he saw: his father’s favorite cherry tree out in the yard. He knew this was wrong, but he just got caught up in the moment, ya know? Sometimes that happens.

Well, as soon as George was done, his dad came upon him, axe in hand, and his favorite cherry tree, chopped in half on the ground. George’s dad was sad. This was his favorite cherry tree and someone had just gone and chopped it up with an axe! So he did what any good father would do: absolutely nothing.

You see, if George’s dad had asked him if he had chopped down the cherry tree, that would have only further divided the cherry tree. And yeah, George walked around all day saying, “I’m gonna chop down that cherry tree with my new axe and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop me,” but those were just words. And yes, his words led to actions which led to a dead cherry tree, but what’s done is done!

Will apologizing or taking accountability fix the tree? No! Now is the time for us to pick up both halves of the cherry tree, tape them together, and hold them up with a stick or something so it looks like it’s still alive. Sure, the tree is probably going to wither and die over the next couple weeks, but the important thing here is it looks like the tree is alive.

So the moral of the story here is that if someone is holding an axe, you pretty much let them do what they want because they are holding an axe.